Oh . . . and also . . .

(Yes, I am on a venting kick here. Bear with me.)

On top of please writing this material for FREE, these same companies will not tell you how much the project will pay IF/WHEN you get hired.

That's right.

You can submit a resume, do an interview, write a sample and THEN, when they decide to hire you, discover that their pay rate is far below what you usually get, so you end up turning them down.

Remind me again why I am in this field.

Oh yea. No panty hose, my own hours, home with the family, and my office is in the living room. Now I remember.

Can You Imagine . . . .

Can you imagine . . .

• being a carpenter and being interviewed to do a whole house remodel . . . .the client says, Hey, do my bathroom FOR FREE and if I like it, I will hire you to remodel the rest. 
• being a photographer and being interviewed for a wedding . . . the client says, Hey, take pictures of my cousin's bar mitzvah FOR FREE and if I like them I will hire you for the wedding.
• being a doctor and doing a history on a new patient. . . .the patient says, Hey, repair my hernia FOR FREE and if you do a great job, I will let you take out my gallbladder.

No? None of these sound plausible? Well, if you're a freelance writer, you had better get used to it. 

Oh yes, we are considering you for this job. Your resume is extensive. Your interview was flawless. BUT. BUT . . . we want you to write a sample for us. It will take you HOURS. You will spend the best part of a day working on it BUT . . . .you are also going to do it FOR FREE. Yes, and IF we like it, we will hire you. Will we pay for the sample? Heck, no. That is just hours you have to donate to prove you're worthy. 

I understand that companies have to hire carefully and they have a LOT of applicants to weed through, I really do. But for me to make time to do your sample, I have to push aside paying clients and that seems a bit foolish. If you would offer to pay for the sample, even if you want to base it on payment only if I am hired for the job, that would be really professional. 

Unless, of course, you know a carpenter that would be willing to come and do part of my remodel for free. Then, we can talk. 

If I could . . . .

If I could say anything to the editors and companies I work for . . .it would be this . . . .

When you tell me that:

• you have misplaced my invoice
• you need my invoice on a different form
• your accounting person is on vacation or maternity leave
• you are changing accounting systems
• your payment system had a glitch
• you can't find my W-9 form and need another one
• you overlooked my original invoice, so please resend
• your process just changed from 30 days to 45 or 90 days

This is what happens on my end because YOU are the only money I get. If it isn't in the mailbox, I don't have any income. I have no regular "payday. So when you don't send the check when I am expecting you to: 

• We don't go out for coffee
• We don't fill up the gas tank
• We don't pay our bills on time
• We start buying groceries at the Dollar Tree
• We skip meals
• We fall behind on utilities
• We empty our coin jars
• We empty our savings accounts

So, please, PLEASE, try to pay your writers on time. You have no idea what a domino effect it can have when you send an email letting us know the check we expected three days ago has been delayed a week, two weeks, a month--or more. It isn't fun, it isn't easy, and it makes my work that much harder. 

Thus end today's public service announcement. 

A Sacred Hour

I am not one for making serious new year's resolutions. Of course, each year, all of us take turns saying our top three--it has become a tradition. One of mine, due to a generous dose of HN (husband nagging) was to establish more regular sleeping hours. Mine were admittedly erratic. I often did not get into bed until 1 or 2 a.m., commonly working until I got up to get in bed--not terrific for easy sleeping. My head would still be completely caught up in the project I was working on, and I would be there for more than 30-45 minutes before finally going to sleep.

So, we started a new habit. Right around 10 p.m. I get off the computer, say goodnight to the kids, and go upstairs. Then, Joseph and I turn on classical music (another change for me), and putting our pillows just right, we get in bed and we read for an hour. Doesn't sound like much, I know, but it has really altered the day for me.

I love this quiet time with Joseph. The kids are downstairs watching another episode of "Dr. Who" or something along those lines. J and I cuddle (a lot--I usually have both legs thrown over him) and we read. I read for FUN. Nothing for work. (A side effect is that in only the first 6 weeks of the year, I have read nine books!) We read fun lines out loud. Share a quote we like. Laugh. Share an apple.

I LOVE this hour. I slow down my brain. I feed it fun material. I get warm and cozy in bed with my favorite husband. At 11, the lights go out, the radio goes off, and we cuddle closer in the darkness, under warm quilts. I turn on my CD player (with tinnitus, a quiet room will drive me nuts) and drift off with J spooning behind me. the music under my pillow, and peace in my mind and heart. What a wonderful way to end the day, right?

Reading the Comics

Do you read the newspaper's comics? We have for years, following certain ones closely that seemed to reflect our lives. It used to be "Baby Blues", then "Foxtrot" and "Zits". Lately "Pickles" covers some very familiar topics. :)

Reading comics in the Orr house is a bit of a tradition. I was reminded of that this morning as Nicole, Joseph and I were reading them in a coffee shop. We separate the comics into single pages (two on weekdays, and three on Sundays when they're in color) and hand one to each person. Then THIS happens . . . . .we read, we snicker, chuckle, and smile . . . then we look up and say "Luann" or "Stone Soup" or whatever name of the comic we just read and appreciated. That is code for "pay special attention to this one because it's extra great today". Then, occasionally, we will read a comic either so funny, so poignant, or so true for us that we will stop the other ones reading and make them read that comic right now.

I love the process. I love how we share and hand back and forth and make comments. Many times, the cartoons will spark memories, thoughts, ideas, and conversations. Now and then it will remind me of when Jasmine was very small and Joseph would pull her up on his lap and, since it was before she could read, he would read each one to her, panel by panel, making different voices for each character. It made her laugh. It was something the two of them shared and it is a sweet memory.

I cut out comics I like best. I send them to friends or put them on the fridge with magnets. I have a few I have had for more than 15 years.  One of my all time favorites was reposted today and I am including it here for your enjoyment. Hope it makes you smile as much as it did when we read it in the coffee shop this morning!

Creating Family Memories

When I was a little girl, oh heck, until I was off to college, my parents would take me on our annual "fall drive". We would get in the car, me in the back seat with books and a pillow, and head out of the city to the country roads. We would drive in search of finding a pumpkin farm to get a pumpkin to carve for Halloween, plus some tasty hot chocolate to sip, and we would each keep our eyes darting about to point out the most beautiful leaves on a tree . . . well, until the next one. We would exclaim at the colors and wonder why the trees dropped their traditional green garb in autumn to dress up in oranges, reds, browns, and golds. As a young child, I remember thinking they were dressing up for the upcoming holidays. (I still like that idea better than the scientific chlorophyll explanation.)

Reflecting back on that memory and how strongly it stays in my heart, I wonder what family memories we are creating for our children, and which ones they will most likely remember. Some they will be far too young to recall. When Jasmine was a baby, she would always fall asleep during car rides. On nights when she was just so wide awake at bedtime, we would get in the car and drive back roads for 30 minutes until she fell asleep. Then we would carry her like a fragile egg into the house to make sure she stayed asleep tucked under the covers between us. Those drives in the darkness were precious. Joseph and I had long talks and we sang to Jasmine and I nursed her (yeah, I know . . car seats . . . but now and then . .. ) and it was like we were in this cocoon of darkness with our headlights just showing what was a few feet in front of us. I know she can't remember those days since she was so tiny, but we do. I hope she does remember trips to Camp Singing Hills and countless days of ushering, and movie quotes on the computer screen and staying up late to watch movies.

I think that Nicole, Caspian and Coryn will remember many of the events from our life in Oregon. They will remember midnight runs to VooDoo Donuts. They will remember countless trips to the ocean/coast. They will remember Saturday nights on the couch watching some ridiculously stupid, cheesy scifi movie.They will remember sitting at tables in bookstores with piles of books, and passing them around to share and picking out something to take home.

What I want all of them to remember, more than anything, is that we are a family and that we loved every one of our wonderful children. We weren't infallible (lord, the mistakes we made over the years!), and sometimes our intentions were good but our follow through was flawed. Sometimes we were tired or broke or sick or sad . . . . and that impacted our ability to be mom and dad. But overall, without reservation, we have loved our four kids with every ounce of love we had, and did the best we possibly could.

And when they are grown ups, and we are gone, I desperately hope they will look back and smile. I hope they will realize that family memories are more precious than anything else and that they will, in turn, create precious memories with their own.

Happy New Year/Happy Birthday

Ah, I have been remiss in keeping up--apologies. I could blame it on work, which is partially true, but I have also been battling the dreaded LAZINESS plague. I get up in the morning and want little more than to spend the day on the couch reading, writing letters, watching movies and talking to my wonderful little family.
Alas, I have not found a way for that to earn money to pay bills, so I spend most of it in front of the computer instead. Work Karma has been good to me--I have been hired for a half dozen new jobs just in the first two weeks of the year. I am grateful. Tired, but grateful. :)

In addition to it being a New Year, today is also Joseph's 61st birthday. We are spending it the way he wants--a homemade breakfast with everyone at the table, then a few stops at thrift stores, perhaps a car parts store or two, and, if there's still time leftover, a peaceful layover at a bookstore. We sang to him at midnight and I gave him his traditional, very personal, no way Hallmark could ever compete with this card. We came downstairs to find post-it notes in every room saying, "Happy Birthday" from the kids. Tonight we will all gather in the living room to watch a cheesy monster movie or something along those lines. I also plan to call Joseph's mom and thank her for bringing such an amazing person onto the planet.

Tomorrow a few of the VW guys are heading over to the house to help Joseph rebuild an engine. I will be in the house researching for my next book and bringing out cold beers and hot pizza when the men are ready. Through every minute of this, I will be smiling, and basking in gratitude that I have this life, this man, and this family.