Saturday, October 25, 2008

A Serious Case of CRS

For most of my life, one of the things I prided myself on was my ability to remember or recall things. Need a phone number you haven't used for months? Ask me cuz I will remember it. Need a person's name you briefly met last year? I know what it is. What was the title of that book you read last summer? I can tell you.

Well, no longer.

Maybe because of age--and mostly because of this damn hyperparathyroidism (HPT)--my memory seems to be full of gaping holes. Things that I usually remember without any effort are just beyond me these days. Last night, my son needed a password I had set up for him just a few weeks ago. I could not remember that password to save my life. Now I use the same two for everything but this one required throwing in a number and letter, etc, etc and I just could NOT recall what I used. I ended up more upset and frustrated than he was. This wasn't the first incident either. The other night I wrote about 1000 words and the computer lost them when I went to transfer them from one to another. I had to completely reconstruct them and it about killed me. I was in tears and it took me more than 30 minutes just to begin to rewrite it.

To make matters worse, when I run into something like this, it is almost impossible for me to let it "roll off my back". I have had more trouble controlling my frustration and tension levels than any other time in my life. I am a mellow person by nature. REALLY. But in the last few weeks, there are times I really have to fight not to act like . . . fill in the blank with your favorite word of choice. This too is a sign of the HPT. I keep telling myself that as soon as this surgery is over, I will be healthier, happier and able to remember things again.

Currently, it is about 92 hours until that surgery.
Can't tell I'm eager, can you?
I'd tell you more about it, but I can't remember what I wanted to say . . . .

1 comment:

Ami said...

I don't like that '92 hours' thing.

It feels better to me to think of it as being four (FOUR!!??) days from now.

I mean, I know you're going to feel better. And I want that.

But... I worry.