Saturday, April 23, 2011


Today was a tough, tough, tough day.
I didn't sleep well, knowing that Nicole was leaving. We got up and went to get the rental car we had reserved. When we got there, we realized that NO WAY would three young adults fit in the back seat. To move up to the mini-van would almost triple the cost.
We decided to take our van and hope for the best.
We left and the ride was long but relatively stress free. We got to Bellingham with 90 minutes to kill before she boarded. That was one L O N G 90 minutes. We said our goodbyes and I lasted until she was on the deck, at which point I began to sob. That kept going for the next hour. Or more. the hugs her brothers and father gave her were so tender. The love all three men gave me afterwards was also. Caspian had to share his 18th birthday with his day and did so absolutely selflessly.
The trip home was long, long, long. I cried multiple times. We forgot to get our gas money from Nicole and came home on fumes. The constant worry over the van, and money and missing Nicole made for a rough time of it.
While we were gone, I was called by a woman upset with me for not paying an invoice I had received just the night before at 10 pm. I had no idea it was due immediately. She wanted me to, literally, stop my trip to Washington, find an Internet connection, and pay it. I was completely shocked as this was never mentioned when I had the computer repair done the afternoon before. I came home and emailed an apology, saying I was sorry about the misunderstanding and let's just say, the apology wasn't accepted and only seemed to accelerate the problem. This kind of disagreement makes my unbearably uncomfortable, but when you add everything else that is going on in my life to it, I am a basket case. And guess what? My computer isn't working again. Sigh.
My sons received birthday money in the mail today. Without a word, they handed all of it over to me to help the money crunch. That made me cry again. Good kids, these boys of mine.
I am so worn out, I am not sure I can get from the computer to the bed. I'm going to try though. Please send good thoughts my way because this woman is stressed out.


Aimee said...

Hugs hugs and more hugs, feeling that stressed out is so hard :(

I'm thinking of you, my friend.

And also, easily imagining myself in your shoes when my girl goes off into the world, I know I will be a wreck.

Ami said...

I love you.